I Hit the Road Again--and It Hit Back (Thailand, 5/15/08-6/12/08)

As most of you know, I am back on the road again after taking a break for a couple of months in California. I came back from Costa Rica on Feb. 22 and left for Thailand on May 15. Yes, I am SERIOUSLY behind on my blogs. I still have pretty much all of Central America and lots of Mexico to write up yet.

In May, prior to leaving for Thailand, I went back to Illinois to visit family and friends, since I will probably not be back for Christmas again this year. While there, my family threw me a surprise 40th birthday party. I was definitely surprised--my birthday was not for 3 more months. They knew I would not be in the country for my birthday and figured that that was the only shot they would get.

Some of you may know that I had planned to go to South America after my break, followed by Asia later. I decided to go to Asia first for a few reasons:

1. The thought of going back to Latin America filled me with dread rather than excitement.
   
2. The thought of going back to Asia, in contrast, sounded like a lot of fun.
   
3. It would be winter in South America.
   
4. A friend of mine in Bangkok was about to move to Europe, and by going to Asia first, I could visit him before he left.
   

Because of that last reason, I started my Asia trip in Bangkok--a place that
I became very familiar with in previous trips to Asia.

Sadly, my trip to Thailand was largely miserable. I tend to regret very little--mistakes tend to make valuable learning experiences--but I regret going back to Thailand when I did. I had gone there to visit my friend, of whom I had many happy memories. Those happy memories have now been replaced with some very unhappy ones. I would have preferred to have just left things as they were when I last visited.

Five years ago when I was in Thailand, after meeting in Bangkok, my friend and I took a trip to Ko Samui which was filled with a lot of things that still made us laugh recalling them. Two years ago we took a nice, low-key trip to Cha Am. On that trip, I was happy to see that my friend's life had changed for the better, and he seemed much happier than I remembered him years before. But just as I was very happy to see these changes in him two years ago, I was very unhappy to see some of the changes that took place between then and now. I am not at liberty to say what those changes were--I promised I wouldn't--but the resulting behavior put a big strain on our friendship. So much of a strain that I don't even know if I would still call us friends. Time will tell. On the bright side, I think the source of most of the problems will go away when he leaves the country--away from some bad influences and into the presence of someone who will not put up with what was going on.

I arrived in Thailand at midnight after a 24-hour plane trip. A day before I left California, my friend invited me to take a trip with him and some friends to Ko Samet--a place that I had considered visiting last time I was in Thailand. A bit hesitantly, I agreed to go. I wish I had not. A lot of bad shit went down there, and the rest of my visit to Thailand never recovered from that. Don't get me wrong--I was never in any danger and the bad things that happened did not happen to me, but what happened there disturbed me so much that it had me lying in bed awake for many nights. Again, I cannot go into details because I promised that I wouldn't.

I should say that the things that were wrong with that trip to Ko Samet had nothing to do with Ko Samet itself. In fact, I would recommend Ko Samet. It has beautiful beaches with rustic beachside restaurants that do not spoil the scene by pumping out loud music and creating that whole "party 'til you puke" vibe. (At least, this is true of the part of the island where I stayed.) You can find all the relaxation you want there or you can dance all night if you prefer. Ko Samet seems to have found a nice balance, and I enjoyed both sides of it.

In spite of the aforementioned disturbing incidents, I did have some genuinely good times on Ko Samet. I went dancing on several nights with my friend and his friends and had a lot of fun. (I found out weeks later that someone else who knew me from Bangkok saw me dancing on Ko Samet but was not sure it was me, since he did not know I was back.) After one such night out, we stopped by a booth to play that carnival game where you throw darts at balloons to win a prize. Someone won a Piglet stuffed toy, which was given to me and now shows up in photos of the places I visit.

Also, on Ko Samet, I had a very good conversation with my friend, where he showed me photos from the past few years and told me about his days as a monk last year. In Thailand, it is not uncommon for men and boys to spend a little time--a few weeks or months--as Bhuddist monks. (I know another friend--Siam--who has done this as well.) It is often done to honor their families. The last time I visited my friend, he told me that he had planned to someday be a monk for a while to honor his mother. I had a hard time picturing him as a monk then. When he showed me the photos and told me about the experience, I saw a side of him that I had not seen before. His plan was to be a monk for two weeks. Once he started, he decided to continue for five months. He tried to describe the feeling that made him stay, but had difficulty. In the end, he just said something to the effect that he stayed because he felt so strongly in his heart. I found it incredibly touching.

On Ko Samet and afterwards, the friendship pretty much crumbled, leading to some hurt feelings, but still, some pretty good times in Bangkok. The last few days before I left Thailand did a lot to mend things between us, but I suspect that it was too little too late. Time will tell. When I go back to Bangkok, he will not be there, and I find that to be a relief, which in itself is sad. I would like to think that our friendship will recover, but I do not have a lot of hope. Sigh.

My arrival in Thailand was met with the worst case of insomnia that I have ever had. My second worst case was the last time I arrived in Thailand. I blame this mostly on the flight there. (I took the same flight both times.) Usually, I combat jet lag after an all night flight by staying up until at least 8 pm and then sleeping until morning. Using this trick, I have almost never had jet lag. Unfortunately, my 24-hour flight to Bangkok landed at around midnight. There was no way I could stay up another 20 hours before sleeping. (I did, however, stay up until around 4am talking with my friend.) I hardly got any sleep for the next week. I was amazed that I could go so long with so little sleep. I was awake for 24-hours straight more than once. When I did sleep, it was generally for an hour or two. (It was not all jet lag--nights out, rock-hard beds, and troubling incidents contributed to the insomnia.) Usually, after two or more nights without much sleep, I tend to get sick--colds and the like. I was feeling amazingly fit after my week of sleeplessness.

Once I got back to Bangkok, I reconnected with several other old friends. I visited with Siam--the first friend I ever made in Thailand. We caught up and he showed me his brand new condo. It is tiny, but it is in a very nice building. (So nice, that the previously mentioned friend used to dream of living there when viewing it from the balcony of his apartment a few blocks away.)

I also visited Dew, who is now the proud proprietor of a new guesthouse in Bangkok. The building is owned by his family, but he was in charge of renovating it and turning it into a guesthouse. It is pretty much his baby. He gave me the grand tour. When I left Thailand, it had not yet opened. Dew and I met and hung out several times when I was in Bangkok five years ago. He visited San Francisco a couple of years ago, at which time I showed him around and introduced him to Halloween in the Castro with some friends.

I also met a few new friends in Bangkok to replace the ones that have left the city or lost touch since I first started going there.

I have always loved Bangkok, inexplicably, from the first time I went there. I have to say, however, that each time I go back, some of the luster wears off. There was a time that I would have loved to live in Bangkok. Now, I'm not so sure. I still like it, partially because of its status as my home-away-from-home, but now it is more of a "yeah, I guess I like it" rather than "oh, my God, I love it". But as long as I have friends there, I expect that I will like it. And it is any easy place to make friends, which is something that has always made me like it.

I stayed in a different hotel during this visit to Bangkok--The Blooms Residence. It was suggested to me because I was staying for a while and they have cheap monthly rates--about $225 a month. The room was tiny, but fully functional, and best of all, quiet. It was a 15 minute walk to the nearest train station (more than I would have liked), but other than that, fairly well located. When I checked the rates for the hotel, they had three rates: daily, monthly, and hourly. Yep. Hourly. The place really did not exude the no-tell motel ambiance, and there were plenty of families staying there, but anyone who knew of the place knew of it as a haven for sex tourists. After I checked in, I happened upon a little tidbit on the web. It turns out that the wacko that claimed that he killed JonBenet Ramsey (remember her?) was living there when he "confessed". (For those who do not commit details of media frenzies to memory, it was concluded that this guy could not possibly have killed her and was just nuts.)

Another new thing added on this trip to Bangkok was my use of motorcycle taxis. There was always a bunch of them waiting outside my hotel. During high traffic times, they are a lot faster than regular taxis because they can just go around the cars in a traffic jam. And, I was surprised to discover, they have fixed rates, so you do not have to negotiate a price like you do with tuk-tuks. Of course, you always run the risk of getting your head splattered on the pavement. They usually have an extra helmet to help prevent this.

When my one month visa expired, I left Thailand. I had an old friend to meet in Bali.